avalaughs | test drive meme ⚔️️ 23

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test drive meme ⚔️️ 23 | FINAL

	QUICK NAV: ⚔️️ Premise ⚔️️ Rules ⚔️️ FAQ ⚔️️ Taken ⚔️️ Locations ⚔️️ Bestiary
⚔️️ View Top-Levels Only ⚔️ IMPORTANT NOTE: The sun and moon have returned to normal, but the Calamity is still visible in the sky.

ARRIVAL

The re-arrival of characters who were previously not here does not occur in the Bay this month. Instead, re-arrivals can appear at any time or place on the map as long as there is water. The Lady of the Lake is busy dealing with the situation in Atlantis (see the QuestBoard), so her magic isn’t very directed right now. Want to show up in the Red Spring? In someone’s shower? Stuck in the well the minotaur pissed in? Go for it! It’s time to get wet and wild. In fact, you could even show up underwater…

DARLING, IT’S BETTER

After the success at Dinas Emrys, the people of the cursed underwater town return to Camelot’s shores to offer a unique opportunity - to visit the town itself. It has only been seen in the distance before and this is the first time in many years that they have opened their gates to strangers, but all the hard work that the otherworlders have been putting in to fix the Calamity had not gone unnoticed even by them.

A few of the merfolk arrive at Camelot and ask people to put up notices for them. The following day they will be waiting for anyone who wants to make the trip down to the town, which they reveal is called Apkallun, and they will utilise the crown used to get everyone to Dinas Emrys to transform them into merfolk.

Merperson (fish bottom) - Merpeople’s singing voices are able to put people and creatures into a trance.

Cecaelia (octopus bottom) - Cecaelia can normally grant vengeance wishes, but per previous events, wish magic is not currently functioning as it should- so their primary features are the ability to ink and use their tentacles as additional controllable appendages.

Naga (serpent or eel bottom) - Naga have advanced strength and can extend their nails as claws.

The trip to the town is fairly uneventful, unless someone decides to wander off and gets stuck in some kelp or kidnapped by mischievous nymphs hiding along the route. Once there, it’s clear that the arrival of outsiders has been much anticipated by the town. They have put on a grand welcoming for their visitors and although many of the townspeople seem nervous to make eye contact with the strangers the atmosphere is not an unwelcoming one. Everyone is told that they may tour the town at their leisure and move about as they wish, and there is plenty to see.

OUTSKIRTS

It isn’t advised to linger around the areas outside the town, where the light of the lanterns quickly fades out through the water and leaves anyone straying wandering about in a murky darkness. For those more intrepid explorers, though, quick investigation of a noticeboard near the centre of the town will reveal a faded ‘dead or alive’ poster for something called The Wispmera, with a reward of twenty lavender pearls. Enquiring about it will draw laughs and puzzled looks from the townspeople, who will inform the enquirer that no one has ever gone after the creature in all the time the notice has been up. Further pressing will reveal, as they grow quiet and avert their gazes, that this beast will swiftly snatch up children who stray too far outside of the town unaccompanied.

However, all is not as it seems…

Hunting down the creature is no easy task and the descriptions of it are vague. It’s described as a barely-mer shaped thing that haunts the area around half a mile outside of town, occasionally drawing close only to be chased off by the town guard. Some people describe it as glowing, or having a massive head, and of being able to paralyse people from several metres away.

Even reaching the area where the creature is usually seen is fraught with dangers, including carnivorous fish and strong water currents, but persistent hunters will eventually come across the ‘beast’. It has the appearance of a huge jellyfish with poison tendrils wafting delicately though the water around it, but a moment of inspection will allow one to note that this creature also has a mer’s tail, and is simply sitting on a rock in the dark. If one can sneak up on it, it would be easy to kill. This first option would be the easy route to getting the reward and no one in town would fail to be grateful. The second, more risky option would be to engage it in combat, however those tendrils are able to paralyse a person within minutes should they hit. Anyone who is stunned by the creature will find themselves on the edge of the town after they black out, as if someone carefully brought them there.

There is a third option, however. Approaching the creature with no weapons will startle it, but it will not attack. This beast is far from the terrible child-stealing monster that those in the town would paint it as. In fact it has never stolen any children at all! All this poor thing desires is to be left alone, having never done any harm to anybody, and all of the stories about it have simply been passed down over time by frightened people who did not know what they were seeing out in the dark. If the hunter agrees to not kill the creature it will give them five pale blue-coloured pearls in thanks, but this will forgo the reward from the town. Unfortunately, no one is going to believe that you saw the creature at all.

DOWNTOWN

In downtown, around something that looks like it used to be a fountain, a bustling market has been set up with various stands and stalls selling local produce and items. Even the native townsfolk seem to be excited about this as it isn’t a regular occurrence and was thrown together in quite the rush after it was announced that strangers from the land would be coming to visit.

The stalls are offering food and drink, as well as handmade wares. The food is mostly fish-based, but some care has been taken to make choices available for those people who don’t eat fish (though that selection is somewhat limited). Locally made items are made mostly of shells, stones and driftwood as well as glass, and the stall-runners will eagerly push things into people’s hands if they show the slightest interest.

There is one large stall supplying most of the drinks on offer. Rather than being in glasses or bottles, they come in small magical bubbles that you pop into your mouth and break with your teeth and boast a variety of interesting and ‘enlightening’ effects.

BLUE - a cool flavour almost like plain water, but uniquely fresh. Consuming it will cause the person’s skin to glow faintly for several hours.
RED - tart with a faintly spicy kick. Drinking this will make you hiccup multi-coloured bubbles when you try to speak and lasts for around ten minutes.
PURPLE - unexpectedly citrus-flavoured. This one causes the water being ‘exhaled’ from the gills as the person breathes to be dyed several different colours and will last for half an hour.
ORANGE - tastes like honey and ginger. This one will cause the drinker to speak in rhyming couplets for around an hour.
GREEN - tastes very much like absinthe. Also acts very much like absinthe. This will just get you very drunk very fast. Good luck.

UPTOWN

Part of the town is clearly far more… ‘polished’ than the rest. The homes are fronted with shining opals and nacre, and although the people there seem friendly enough there is a certain aloofness to them that isn’t found in the bustling marketplace or the streets around it.

But no matter, that isn’t why people have been directed there. The reason for any outsider to be shown the way to this area (unless they found their own way there) is to attend a concert being put on at the theatre in honour of their esteemed guests. There is a buzz about this show, with the performer clearly being someone of some note, and though there are no posters or pictures on the front of the building everyone is urged that they ‘wouldn’t want to miss it’.

The lights go up, and the performer is an ethereal oceanid of exceptional beauty who has been living in the town since she was brought to Avalon as an outsider herself many years ago. Though she doesn’t sing in a language anyone would be able to comprehend the emotion that she sings with could be enough to drive those in the audience to tears. Indeed, several people are seen to be leaving before the show is even finished and once it is over the entire room erupts into raucous applause.

Those otherworlders who attended the performance will be able to see beauty in everything and may find their emotions to be somewhat off-balance, making them more prone to outbursts and also to blurting out the truth to those around them. This effect should wear off after a few days, but any dreams that they have in the meantime will feature the oceanid’s singing in the background.

—-----------

THE RING OF DISP(HELL)

Part 1: Hot in Herre

As the otherworlders passed the test of nobility, the dragons reveal the location of the ring: it is hidden deep in a volcano. They are able to provide a map, but not much information about what can be expected once people get there.

The volcano itself is not one that the otherworlders would be entirely unfamiliar with, but it is not one that many would have had reason to approach before: the northernmost Ash Mountain, a volcano with plume-hidden bluffs nestled between Mab’s Cavern and the Perilous Desert. Though the Elphame traders are not around to offer much in the way of gear or protection this time around the dragons themselves offer to teach people a special spell (Spell: Dragonscale) which they say will protect from the heat and fumes that will need to be dealt with to reach the ring.

It’s recommended to give this spell some practice due to how valuable it will be when going up towards the volcano’s summit and for the trials beyond, but be warned that overuse can cause stiff joints, inability to regulate body temperature, and chronic burping that makes it feel like you just ate a dozen ghost peppers.

There will be plenty of time to gather supplies and kit, though some of the more unscrupulous merchants in Avalon are taking advantage of the rush as well as the lack of traders from Elphame, and are raising their prices. Some of the gear being sold may not quite be up to the task, either…

Part 2: Feeling Magmanimous

Arriving at the volcano is a trial in itself. The dragons will take those willing to go most of the way, but will drop them near the foot of the mountain to let them make their way up on foot. Their reasoning for this, they say, is to ensure that everyone is able to acclimate to the environment on their way up… but it might just be that they have better things to be doing.

With everyone loaded up it doesn’t take long for things to start becoming difficult. The heat rises swiftly around the travelers and there is very little movement in the air to offset it. Foul-smelling gasses rise up from vents and deep, narrow chasms along the edges of what appears to be a lightly-trodden path, if one could say it is a path at all, between slow-moving lava flows. What vegetation there is at the base of the volcano quickly gives way to the occasional tuft of dry grass and sickly-looking tree that has dared try to grow in this location. There is the constant, unsettling sensation of being watched despite the land around them appearing utterly bereft of any fauna.

Going too near to the edge of the path, woefully under-marked as it is, will put all but the most sure-footed in danger of slipping on the loose, shale-like ground beyond and sliding off down towards one of the oozing rivers of molten rock snaking their way down the side of the volcano. ‘Dragonscale’ won’t be enough to keep anyone from injury if they hit it, so watch out for each other!

A half day’s journey is what it takes to reach a mark on the map which seems to show the entrance to a large tunnel system, and though the entrance itself will be a tight squeeze for some it opens up initially into a spacious cavern that is somehow several degrees cooler than outside.

No doubt a few people will want to make up a camp and get some rest here. That’s probably a good idea. Beyond the cavern itself are several dark tunnels, shown on the map as Labrinth y Brenin, and some preparation is advised before heading into those passageways…

Part 3: Turnkey Toasted

When everyone is prepared, the final and most vital part of the expedition can begin. It is advised to take some kind of light source into the tunnels, as once the glow of the base camp is left behind the darkness is almost absolute. It quickly becomes hot and stuffy as progress is made through the winding passages and anyone who decides to lean on one of the walls to take a breather will quickly realize why - the tunnel walls are warm, almost hot, as if molten rock flows not too far behind them.

Occasionally the tunnel opens into small open spaces, like pockets in the mountain, where lava flows slowly in lazy rivers below the path as it precariously bridges over and edges around it. It might be tempting to linger in these spaces, where the pressing sensation of several hundred feet of rock above and around you is not so keen, but lingering for too long will have an unpleasant side-effect.

The fumes rising from the lava in these small caverns can cause powerful hallucinations, driving people to see their worst fears - real or perceived. It will be up to those who remain unaffected to make sure that their companions make it to safer ground, where the effects will wear off after a few minutes. Until then, it will be up to friends and strangers alike to make sure that those who are under the influence of the toxic gasses don’t cause harm to themselves or others.

Finally, hopefully without too much incident, the final cavern is arrived at. This is a large space, refreshingly cool despite several waterfalls of molten rock rolling slowly down the walls, and the ceiling glitters with geode clusters. In the centre of the cavern is a transparent, locked box inside which a simple ring can be seen. Underneath the box is an inscription.

You cannot prove, but you always know:

The apple falls, the wasp stings, a friend comes, the keys turn.

But what does this mean? The number of lava-falls in the cavern match the number of required keys to open the box, but surely the instructions can’t mean what they seem to?

Close examination of the falls will reveal the faint glint of gold behind them - the pieces are indeed behind the molten rock. Though it seems impossible, those who put their hands through the lava with faith that they will not be harmed will find that rather than burning, they only feel a pleasant warmth as the lava-fall parts around their hand and arm and allows them to pluck the key piece from behind it. Without faith… well, why would you stick your hand in lava if you really think your hand will melt off?

Once all the pieces are gathered by the faithful (and brave), the box can be opened and the simple ring is no longer quite so simple-looking. It can be taken without further trial, and the only task that remains is to make it back to base camp without accidentally falling off a bridge.

With the final item retrieved those who ventured out are free to return to Camelot, where they will need to hand the ring over to Merlin so the final preparations can be made to end the Calamity once and for all.

• This is the final "test drive meme," to welcome returning characters and wrap up the journey to get Lancelot's Ring of Dispell.
• Anyone may reply to any threads or start top-levels. Whichever you prefer!
• If nothing here tickles your fancy, try one of this month's Quests for your TDM prompt.
• Questions about this TDM's content? Comment here!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Being with Taichi for so long, and hearing his many dumb sayings, Hikaru considers it to be romantic in some way. At least, it makes Hikaru laugh and that was what had endeared Taichi to him in the first place. After all, Hikaru loves his dumb ass anyway. Just like Taichi loves his dumb ass.

When Hikaru remembers that they are not alone, he pulls back from the kiss he returned, just a little embarrassed. Hikaru only wants to share what he's decided is okay. But when the bartender offers the whiskey sour to Hikaru and says it's free, it hits Hikaru that if he's old enough to drink here then...]

Taichi, let's get married. I have to be eighteen at least, right?

Yeah but you're not old enough!

[ the lights have not clicked yet that they're in a bar and the bartender served Hikaru something alcoholic. So he just gives him a confused puppy look, complete with head tilt.]

Taichi. [Hands on both sides of his face right now and stares into his eyes.]

I'm in a bar and just ordered a drink. Let it sink in.

We can get alcohol... We can drink..

[ Wait

Wait wait really?

Taichi takes his hand and reaches for Hikaru's. ]

Drink up and let's go!

[It's whiskey, Taichi. Like it's a cocktail but it's still whiskey. You don't just down it. You enjoy it and savor it.

But you also enjoy and savor love so Hikaru is willing to hold off on the drink. Especially because the bartender did offer to give it for free. He can drink later. He can definitely get Taichi to drink with him, too, and trick him into drinking whiskey without watering it down. Is he offering to go elope with Taichi and thinking about pranking him? Yes, absolutely. He's still Hikaru.]

Let's go. [Tugging him out the door and marching out with purpose. He's pretty far from the door when he stops and says:] Wait, where do you go to get eloped here?

Um...

[ He doesn't.. know? He's never considered eloping before. His heart's fluttering and his blood is racing through him right now and he can't think straight, he just knows that he needs to be married to Hikaru right this second. They can't be apart anymore. He squeezes Hikaru's hand, smiling warmly- practically beaming. ]

I guess the castle? Ah, but-- suits! We need suits! And flowers! We need- uh!

[ His eyes widen. ] I'm a Lord, can I marry us?!

We're eloping! Not like what we wear matters right now. We can figure that out with the reception we have later. [They can have a party after they actually get married and figure this out.]

You can't marry yourself, can you? [Can you?]

Right.. right..!

[ It's going to shake him to his core later that he didn't get to have a fancy romantic wedding but they can get remarried and make everyone sit through it later maybe. ]

But..! I have one requirement! You have to let me carry you through the threshold of Chat-toe after!

[ Yes, he's trying to say Chateau. The castle he got for Hikaru that Hikaru only finally gets to see..!! Juza and he have been living there, but there's plenty of space so they can't hear him snore anymore. ]

I... don't know! Should I call Ren-san? What if he doesn't pick up? Hhhh... It's probably too much to bother a goddess to officiate a wedding... [ He's trying to think here. (Do not let him summon Morganna over this.) ]

[Like Hikaru isn't going to make there be some huge show of it when they can. This is a big deal and he has to do things big. It's just part of being rich. Right now, though, this is just about making it official.

And really, they kind of can't do it legally in Hikaru's time anyway.]

Chat-toe? What is...chateau. You mean chateau. [He's laughing and nods.] Yeah, you can do it. As long as you don't summon Morganna. Please. Somehow I don't think she wants to be bothered all the time. [And even Hikaru isn't so much of an egoist to believe he's that important. Damn.]

Crap, though. Uh...why doesn't this place just have a government? [It's a monarchy, Hikaru. Gosh.]

[ Taichi isn't rich, but he does need a spotlight on him or he wilts. He needs lots of love and attention. ]

Deal! Didn't you used to work for the King? Can he do it? Call him up!

[ JUST CALL UP THE KING, HIKARU. ]

I worked for him when I was here! And it's been a while, right? I can't just ask that and it seems like he probably has more important crap going on?

[But if he was still working for him...entirely possible he might ask.]

Edited 2022-09-20 02:28 (UTC)

Ehhh...? Then... Mari Lwyd?! I'll rap battle it again for the right to marry you!

[ his logic is mari=marry, right? ]

Who and you'll what?

[Taichi, he just got back.]

The skeleton horse from fairy land that will make your magic stronger if you don't give up rap battling it.

[ You don't.. necessarily have to be good! Just. Keep rhyming. ]

It seems like an important figure, it could probably marry us right? It's in the name! Marry, then lewd!

A skeleton horse isn't marrying us. I don't even think it can based on that criteria. But even if it could, I'm not rhyming during my wedding. [That's disgusting.

But still...]

Should we just start finding another lord?

Do you want me to text Ren-chan?

[ Ren probably can, right?! Taichi's already getting out his phone. ]

Doesn't this place have a Vegas or something?

[Did...did he just say he'd let himself be married in Vegas?]

I can't believe how far I'm willing to go for you.

I don't want to be married by Elvis impersonators. Let's just go to the castle and ask! They have to have somebody.[ hope Hikaru is ready to get his hand held and pulled along. If they just stand here speculating nothing will get done, if they're walking it might!! ]

Neither do I! [That's not all Vegas has though, okay. That's all!! But as he's being dragged off, it's really honestly willing.]

There has to be something for you being a lord and me working for the king in the past, right?

[ Wait. He is a lord. Hikaru is right. With a town that has a city council so Taichi doesn't ruin everything. Who probably know how to get married in Fleur?? ]

Hikaru, Fleur has a city council! There's no way they didn't figure out something like this there! I have them on speed dial for city emergencies!

[ Taichi's city emergencies so far include: someone drew a dick on his favorite ramp. There wasn't a cool stage for acting on the beach? And also Ren and Taichi want to build a lazy river to increase traffic and commerce between their two townships and also ride an inner tube to visit each other. Either way, Taichi's taking out his phone. This is a city emergency he's pretty sure. ]

[This would have been nice to know. But it isn't the first time that Taichi has forgotten obvious things and Hikaru knows it won't be the last.

With a kiss to Taichi's temple, he sighs:] Good thing you're cute. I was willing to get married in Vegas for you. [Whatever they're about to do isn't much better but he's reminding himself they can do something later. Much more to his tastes and much more romantic to Taichi's tastes.]

I can see your cool place now, right?

Yeah, the castle is much prettier than Vegas.

[ probably. He's never been but he's seen pictures and he knows about the impersonators and drunk gambling. He doesn't want their wedding to stay in Vegas though. ]

Hold my hands, I'll get us there fast.

[ He puts his little doggy ring on (Toto's Totem) and once Hikaru takes his hand, he'll close his eyes and do the mojo. But not unless Hikaru takes them, he's not letting him out of his sight until they're good and married.]

I'd hope it's much prettier than Vegas. [Tsumugi had told him how hard Taichi had worked to get said castle so Hikaru's going to hope it's a decent castle?

But as he grabs Taichi's hands, it feels like it's more than just doing so to be transported somewhere. It feels like some choice to spend the rest of whatever time he can have with Taichi. There's still some part of him that feels strange, picking Taichi to marry. Not because he's unsure of that because no, he's more sure of that than anything. But there is a part of him that has chosen Taichi to be his number one in some ways and that is...it's new.

Still, he squeezes Taichi's hands with a smile. He knows he won't regret it at least.

Super pretty! Some of it is a little sparse... But that's because I was gonna let you do the decorating because you've got better sense than me. And there's a full kitchen because I was gonna hire you a chef! Though it's mostly just the microwave that's been used...

[ Neither Taichi nor Juza felt like they needed a personal chef. ]

And!! There's a special onsen underground just for us that has water cleansed with magic so it's so clean you could drink out of it if you aren't sitting in it.

[ Like Hikaru's family spring but also it's a bath so Taichi is happy. He really thought through a lot of things he thought would make Hikaru happy. ]

And the garden's really beautiful and there's a view of the water that sparkles when the sun is out!

[ Which is all details and seems like rambling until he uses his Toto's Totem ring to transport them there, straight to the front garden, and Taichi smiles brightly. ]

I wanted it to be our home, so... Welcome home, Hikaru!

[Of course Taichi and Juza hadn't felt like they needed a personal chef. But Hikaru would have wanted one because he was a prissy rich kid. At least Taichi's wallet got a break while Hikaru was gone?

As Taichi explains everything, Hikaru is smiling. There had been a vision that Taichi had been trying for, given how he is talking. So much thought had been put into everything and it only reminds him how much he does love Taichi. How couldn't he?

Looking around the garden, looking at all of the work Taichi had been put in, he's far more mesmerized by the person he wants to marry. He leans in and kisses him.]

Thanks.

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